The spit up came out like a volcano. Every single time.
I was a first time mom, and AJ was my pride and joy.
I have no desire to get into a full out debate on breast feeding vs bottle feeding because honestly?
I don’t think it’s anyone’s business what I feed my child, and I don’t think it’s my business what you feed yours.
I knew I wanted to bottle feed from the beginning, and I loved my decision.
Adam was working a lot of hours when AJ was an infant, and weekends became his special time with his boy. I would sleep through the night, and Adam would do the night time feedings. Perfect.
Fortunately for me, even though there were raging lunatics crying out that I was a horrible mother for not giving my child breast milk, the computer and social media were not nearly what they are today, so I didn’t really see or hear them.
(good thing too, because I don’t think Giselle Bundchen would ever hire me to photograph her family if she knew I had bottle fed. ha. Because you know she’s going to, right?)
I just had to deal with a few comments here and there, and mostly just passive aggressive ones.
So I ignored them.
I tried everything. Every brand of formula. Soy formula. I even tried goat’s milk.
You wanna know what goat’s milk looks and smells like? How about what it looks and smells like when it comes back up? Ya Trying that didn’t didn’t last long.
We just kind of waited it out and hoped that by the time he was 5 he would be done.
I remember visiting my sister Melanie at her high school the day she was getting her senior pictures done. She held AJ for about 2 minutes…and what do ya know? Puke central. All over her outfit.
She took it well, but I’m sure she could have done without it!
It’s so weird looking back at all these little things that were bigger than big at the time.
They were huge. What was I supposed to do? What did this book say, what did that book say?
It’s crazy, really. And even though it was the biggest thing in my life at the time, it’s just a funny memory now.
It’s the same thing with the sleep deprivation.
At the time? Oh for the love of peter! How was I ever going to survive?
And why, oh WHY are you not just sleeping?!?!?!?!!?!?
Anyone with me on this one?
I knew that holding AJ every single time he fell asleep was not the easiest choice.
(many people reminded me of that)
But I knew it was the one I loved the most.
Looking at his big blue eyes as they started to get drowsy. Looking at his perfect, chubby cheeks and his sweet little lips. I mean, really. Would you want to put him down?
I remember I would lay down with him on my bed and wait for him to fall asleep.
He would lay there. Kind of restless. And I would sing.
Then I would kind of close my eyes slowly in the hopes that he would take the hint!
Then his eyes would start to droop. Then I would move ever so slightly, and they would pop open.
Then he would eventually fall asleep again and I would start to move off the bed and it would shake a tiny bit…just enough to wake him up. And we would start the entire process all over again.
I think it would literally take me over an hour just to get him to sleep every nap time and every night.
It’s funny, because there are very few issues in life where my advice would be –
whatever works for you.
But when it comes to formula vs. breast milk. Apple juice vs. water. Bottle vs. sippy cup. Holding vs. laying down. Crying it out vs. picking him up.
Whatever works for you!
It’s like people need to stop wigging out already!
AJ does not remember me putting him to sleep that way when he was 6 months old.
But I do.
AJ does not remember that he used to spit up like a mad fool.
But I do.
AJ does not remember that I used to give him sippy cups with juice instead of water.
But I do.
And I love looking back on those things and remembering. I barely remember. Barely.
So really and truly.
Whatever works for you.
Don’t let bossy celebrities, or overbearing relatives push you into changing something that does not matter in the long run.
The days of spit up, bottles, crying and diapers will be over before you know it.
And believe me. You will enjoy the next phase, but you will always have a little piece of you that wishes you could have just one more day of those baby years.
Whatever works for you.